9 Tips for Coping with Holiday Depression and Stress

The stress of the holidays triggers sadness and depression for many people. This time of year is especially difficult because there’s an expectation of feeling merry and generous. People compare their emotions to what they assume others are experiencing or what they’re supposed to feel and then think that they alone fall short. They judge themselves and […]

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The Perplexing Reason Narcissists Ruin Special Days

Have you noticed this?  If you have been involved in any kind of relationship with a narcissist, it will become obvious that drama and chaos are stirred up around your special days, be it a holiday, birthday, anniversary, etc. AND, it is very likely that you will be shaking your head saying, “What the heck?!?!” […]

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How to Feel Grateful When You Don’t

The expectation of feeling grateful can be challenging when we’re struggling with loneliness or relationship, work or health problems. It can be even harder to have gratitude around holidays when we see other people happily celebrating. When you’re discouraged or weighed down with negative thoughts, there are several things you can do. Why Gratitude Can […]

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Dehumanization: The Psychological and Sociological Practice of Destroying Others

On the heels of ending a long-term relationship with a malignant narcissist, Lauren vehemently and unceasingly blamed herself for ‘allowing’ him to sadistically debase her. Although she intellectually concurred with M. Scott Peck’s premise that genuine love is volitional, that true intimacy is contingent on honoring one another’s humanity and that another’s proclivity to abuse […]

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Complex Grief and Trauma In Toxic Relationships

We can’t talk about narcissistic emotional abuse without talking about grief and trauma. Both of these will come up in your recovery. Each individual has their own unique losses to assess and to grieve if it becomes necessary to leave the relationship. Some of these may include: loss of a dream loss of an intact […]

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Manipulative Tactics That Make You Stay

As humans, we want to believe what others say, especially those we love. It is hard to fathom that someone we care for would not be honest with us. Unfortunately, being in a relationship with a narcissist or abusive personality will often condition us to believe whatever the person says, without question. Why be suspicious […]

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Dynamics of A Narcissistic Home

The Narcissistic Parent – Family Dynamic The dynamics in a narcissistic household are abundant.  Each member of the family has certain expectations to fulfill, to satisfy the needs of the narcissist.  In a case where there is only one child, this particular child may have the daunting task of serving several different roles to appease […]

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Can A Narcissist Change? You Betcha — Just Not In The Way You Think

…And definitely not in the way you hope! change changed/changes/changing verb: to make (someone or something) different; alter or modify noun: the act or instance of making or becoming different tactic: what a narcissist does to keep their victim in a state of confusion and dependency Okay, maybe that last one isn’t exactly in the dictionary. […]

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The Narcissist’s Spouse: Understanding Primary Supply

As a complex trauma therapist who specializes in treating trauma incurred through narcissistic abuse, I encounter many spouses desperate to escape from the perfidious torment of marriage to a malignant narcissist. Similarly, I work with adult children of mothers and fathers who embody malignant narcissistic traits or fit the diagnostic criteria for NPD. Narcissistic Personality […]

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Signs of Healthy Boundaries

Healthy boundaries are essential in recovery from codependency. They both build and reflect self-esteem. Learning to have healthy boundaries is an essential aspect of individuating and becoming an individual and autonomous person. Boundaries are learned in childhood. Some dysfunctional families are enmeshed and your individuality and boundaries are ignored or openly disrespected in words or […]

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