An opportune time to troll for supply. Holiday expectations can be challenging. Living up to the idyllic narrative of collective bonding and celebrations in which people everywhere are supposedly experiencing holiday rituals and get-togethers that foster well-being and intimacy can be anxiety-producing. For many folks, the seasonal lure of promised pleasure, coupled with the glitz […]
Read More9 Tips for Coping with Holiday Depression and Stress
The stress of the holidays triggers sadness and depression for many people. This time of year is especially difficult because there’s an expectation of feeling merry and generous. People compare their emotions to what they assume others are experiencing or what they’re supposed to feel and then think that they alone fall short. They judge themselves and […]
Read MoreThe Perplexing Reason Narcissists Ruin Special Days
Have you noticed this? If you have been involved in any kind of relationship with a narcissist, it will become obvious that drama and chaos are stirred up around your special days, be it a holiday, birthday, anniversary, etc. AND, it is very likely that you will be shaking your head saying, “What the heck?!?!” […]
Read MoreManipulative Tactics That Make You Stay
As humans, we want to believe what others say, especially those we love. It is hard to fathom that someone we care for would not be honest with us. Unfortunately, being in a relationship with a narcissist or abusive personality will often condition us to believe whatever the person says, without question. Why be suspicious […]
Read MoreDynamics of A Narcissistic Home
The Narcissistic Parent – Family Dynamic The dynamics in a narcissistic household are abundant. Each member of the family has certain expectations to fulfill, to satisfy the needs of the narcissist. In a case where there is only one child, this particular child may have the daunting task of serving several different roles to appease […]
Read MoreCan A Narcissist Change? You Betcha — Just Not In The Way You Think
…And definitely not in the way you hope! change changed/changes/changing verb: to make (someone or something) different; alter or modify noun: the act or instance of making or becoming different tactic: what a narcissist does to keep their victim in a state of confusion and dependency Okay, maybe that last one isn’t exactly in the dictionary. […]
Read MoreThe Narcissist’s Spouse: Understanding Primary Supply
As a complex trauma therapist who specializes in treating trauma incurred through narcissistic abuse, I encounter many spouses desperate to escape from the perfidious torment of marriage to a malignant narcissist. Similarly, I work with adult children of mothers and fathers who embody malignant narcissistic traits or fit the diagnostic criteria for NPD. Narcissistic Personality […]
Read MoreRecognizing An Emotional Abuser
The truth is you may not recognize him or her at first because they will work overtime to make you feel like you are the answer to their prayers. They will make you feel like you are one in a million, larger than life, and floating on cloud 9 in an intense love affair. They […]
Read MoreCommon Manipulative Tactics of Toxic People
Nobody likes being played. And most people in toxic relationships – which we refer to better as “manipulationships” have no idea that this is exactly what our partners have been doing since the very beginning: using our empathy against us, and tapping on this wonderful quality to keep us “stuck,” or keep us coming back. One […]
Read MoreHow to Protect Yourself in a World of Narcissists and Other Assholes
Let’s talk about boundaries, baby… When I was a teenager, I knew exactly what a boundary was. It was that invisible line we crossed over when my parents drove us from Arizona on our way to Disneyland. Welcome to California! When my first husband came along in my early twenties, I held tight onto my […]
Read More