Dynamics of A Narcissistic Home

The Narcissistic Parent – Family Dynamic The dynamics in a narcissistic household are abundant.  Each member of the family has certain expectations to fulfill, to satisfy the needs of the narcissist.  In a case where there is only one child, this particular child may have the daunting task of serving several different roles to appease […]

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Can A Narcissist Change? You Betcha — Just Not In The Way You Think

…And definitely not in the way you hope! change changed/changes/changing verb: to make (someone or something) different; alter or modify noun: the act or instance of making or becoming different tactic: what a narcissist does to keep their victim in a state of confusion and dependency Okay, maybe that last one isn’t exactly in the dictionary. […]

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The Narcissist’s Spouse: Understanding Primary Supply

As a complex trauma therapist who specializes in treating trauma incurred through narcissistic abuse, I encounter many spouses desperate to escape from the perfidious torment of marriage to a malignant narcissist. Similarly, I work with adult children of mothers and fathers who embody malignant narcissistic traits or fit the diagnostic criteria for NPD. Narcissistic Personality […]

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Common Manipulative Tactics of Toxic People

Nobody likes being played. And most people in toxic relationships – which we refer to better as “manipulationships” have no idea that this is exactly what our partners have been doing since the very beginning: using our empathy against us, and tapping on this wonderful quality to keep us “stuck,” or keep us coming back. One […]

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Please Hoover Me, Narcissist. Why Aren’t They?

I certainly cannot speak for everyone, but I can tell you that you are not alone. I feel sad for you, because I have hoped for the same thing so many times and it never ended well. I’ve had a crazy roller coaster ride of hoovers, so I’ll try my best to share my thoughts […]

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Love After Narcissistic Abuse: Sharing Real Intimacy After Being The Supply

My experience as a survivor and a therapist specializing in treating both complex trauma and narcissistic abuse syndrome has shown me that the violent personal assault inflicted by NPD abuse causes Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) in victims, irrespective of whether they present with a prior history of complex trauma. Accordingly, having somehow managed to keep oneself glued […]

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Parental Alienation: What Is It and How Do You Cope?

After close to three decades and without any planning, I chose to escape a narcissistically abusive marriage. Wow! I wished I would have read Tracy A. Malone’s book, “Divorcing Your Narcissist: You Can’t Make This Shit Up!” because then I would have learned from her extensive research and experience about the “covert tricks they pull” […]

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What Is a Trauma Bond?

A trauma bond is an attachment to an abuser in a relationship with a cyclical pattern of abuse. Patrick Carnes, Ph.D., coined the term in 1997. He defined it as an adaptive, dysfunctional attachment occurring in the presence of danger, shame, or exploitation in order to survive. The bond is created due to a power […]

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Cognitive Dissonance and Narcissistic Abuse

Cognitive Dissonance and Narcissistic Abuse: Breaking Through The Fog of Confusion by Rev. Sheri Heller When American social psychologist Leon Festinger (1956) read about a cult’s fixation with the end of the world due to an apocalyptic flood predicted by extraterrestrials, he embarked on an empirical study to explore the believers’ reactions to the inevitability of having […]

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