How to overcome your ex rejecting you

How to overcome your ex rejecting you

A big thank you to Nancy Sungyun for this great article!

Are you miserable and depressed because your ex is rejecting your wish to get back
together? No matter what you say or do, he or she refuses to get back together with
you. In fact, the harder you work to get back together with them they seem to be running
further away.  You are feeling desperate, hurt and rejected. You are at your wits end
and you don’t know what to do. In this blog I’m going to share with you just how to
overcome what is going on so that you can get your life back and finally have a real
sense of peace.

Do you want to be happy? Of course you do.  Everyone tells you the same thing; leave
your ex alone, don’t contact them anymore, just move on, find someone new.  No matter
how much you want to listen to them, all you find yourself doing is thinking about how
much you want your ex back and feel the pain of rejection and your ability to leave him
or her diminishes as you find yourself sending them those unwanted phone calls and
messages.  You feel so disappointed with yourself for having failed, but you cannot stop
thinking about how hurt you are about the fact that you are not with that person that you
want so much.

Every minute passes by you feel worse and worse and you fear you will never get over
your ex. You are feeling as if you will never stop feeling the pain of their rejection of
you.  I am here to tell you that you can stop feeling that pain. I am certain that you can
and you will if you follow the steps that I will go over with you here.

Would you like to know how you can successfully move on, just like the way you wish
that you could?  Would you like to get over your ex once and for all? Would you like to
get control back and feel sense of peace about your life.  Would you like to stop feeling
the pain that is so excruciating and makes you feel like you are coming out of your skin?
Follow me, read on and I will show you just what to do so that not only will you get a
handle on this, but you will know how to find the truest of love for yourself once and for
all.  You will no longer be consumed with loneliness but feel alive perhaps in ways that
you had never known before.

Let’s go over what is actually happening with you and to you right now.
The reason why you are having a hard time letting your ex go even though they have
made it clear that they do not want to be back together is because you are wanting your
ex to stop the pain of rejection that you are feeling.  You are thinking that as soon as
they are back in your life the pain will stop.
What you are not seeing is that the very thing, the pain of rejection that you feel and are
having a difficult time letting go, in the intensity of how you are unable to let them go,
that very aspect of you is not about your ex, but some thing that desperately needs
attention and healing.

There is an emptiness inside you that even if your ex had come back would still exist
and would play out in that relationship, and in other relationships.
The reason why you are having a hard time letting go is not related to your love for him
or her even though you likely feel like it is.  You are having hard time letting go because
what his or her leaving symbolises to you, and that symbol is your worthiness. You are
thinking that his or her love or desire to be with you means that you are worthy and if
they leave that means you must not be worthy of love and since you want to be worthy
of love, you want that person to stay and help you know that you are worthy of love.

The truth is that when you don’t have the knowing of your own worth, you become
reliant on someone else to prove your worthiness of love but that is never truly
satisfying and ever elusive because unless they are in front of you giving you the
answer that you are worthy of love, you will always need that feed back making you a
needy person and not a whole person.

On the other hand, when you know your worthiness of love on your own, then you are a
whole person, emotionally self reliant and can enjoy another person in your own
independent terms.

How do you learn about your worthiness of love, you ask?  Well, let me tell you. You
first start by regularly practicing loving yourself.  How would you take care of a child that
you love? How would you show that child that you love her? What would you do for that
child that you love?  Those are just some of the things that you start doing.
Doing this self work takes a little time, but aren’t you worth the investment of your time
so that you can be happy permanently?  If you agree, let’s move forward on your path to
true and permanent happiness.

To begin this process the right way, begin taking good and mindful care of your body:
eat well, exercise and give your body a good rest.  That’s what you would do for a child
that you love. You then practice saying you love you but with feelings of love the way
you would say to a child that you love.  Finally, you would do special things for yourself,
as you would for the child that you love: what makes you laugh, what do you enjoy?
What do you love? What makes you feel happy?  What makes you feel inspired? What
touches your heart? What makes you feel relaxed? What gives you feeling of peace?
Do things that make you feel those things and more.

Next you practice self acceptance.  I actually tell my students to “radically” accept
yourself.  What I have my students and clients do is to make a list of the things that you
really don’t like about yourself, that you cannot change and do exercises where you
actually come to adore those aspects of you that you have been critical of until now.
Then the next thing is to practice self compassion any time that you get a chance: when
you make a mistake or had done something wrong, practice compassion instead of
being critical or harsh.  When you begin to give yourself self compassion about those
things that you had been harsh with yourself on in the past, you are powerful loving

When you follow these steps of taking good care of yourself, adoring your flaws and
being compassionate with yourself, you began to truly fall in love with you.  It is
interesting how we do things for those we love and when we do them we fall deeper in
love with them. This is what you must do now and fall in love with yourself and discover
that you are worthy of love and that’s when you find your true love, you.
When you find true love in yourself, that’s when you are truly ready to find true love in
another person.


Nancy holds a Master of Arts Degree in Education (MAED) from the University of Southern
California, a Bachelor of Arts Degree in English Literature from California State University,
Hayward, and a Life Coaching Certificate from CoachU University.
My website:

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