Change your story after Narcissist Abuse?

Subscribe in a reader

We were all handed a deck of cards that is not what we wanted but we have the power to heal and rewrite our story.

 

Transcription:

0:00:07.150,0:00:08.590
This is Tracy

0:00:08.590,0:00:13.679
Today I learned some things and what I’d like to just record a few videos quick ones

0:00:14.080,0:00:17.369
to share you with you some of the notes that I took for my

0:00:18.040,0:00:20.040
exciting Ted talk

0:00:22.930,0:00:25.470
something about like clicked with me was

0:00:28.180,0:00:35.040
Your story, right we all have one and we all have a reason that things have happened to us

0:00:36.460,0:00:38.730
mmM sometimes not our choice obviously

0:00:41.290,0:00:43.290
but

0:00:43.630,0:00:50.279
being in marketing for years like you know the thing has been tell your story tell your story, but

0:00:51.910,0:00:53.910
No one ever said you

0:00:54.850,0:01:01.829
Have the crayons you have the ability to tell yourself a different story

0:01:03.220,0:01:05.729
those a great poet that spoke today and

0:01:07.270,0:01:09.270
he told a story of how he

0:01:10.450,0:01:12.450
was

0:01:12.700,0:01:15.630
when he was very young and in Elementary school

0:01:15.970,0:01:20.760
they were doing some genealogy sort of find out about your tree and

0:01:21.340,0:01:22.780
understand your

0:01:22.780,0:01:24.760
Family’s history and

0:01:24.760,0:01:26.760
He didn’t have any

0:01:26.860,0:01:28.860
they couldn’t find any and

0:01:29.500,0:01:31.500
he went home to his family and

0:01:31.930,0:01:33.750
Yelled at them he was in fourth Grade

0:01:33.750,0:01:38.279
and he went home and yelled at them and said why didn’t you tell me I don’t have a family and

0:01:41.530,0:01:43.530
What his grandmother said was?

0:01:44.680,0:01:46.680
things like

0:01:46.930,0:01:48.930
What kind of ice cream? Do you like?

0:01:49.689,0:01:52.559
And he was like what does that have to do with me not knowing who I am?

0:01:52.930,0:01:55.169
Everyone else has family and they know what they are

0:01:56.380,0:02:00.689
And she said what kind of dinosaur would you be if you could be a dinosaur?

0:02:03.460,0:02:05.460
And he picked a velociraptor

0:02:06.550,0:02:10.589
She asked on all these questions that he had no idea what they meant was [4th] grade

0:02:11.500,0:02:13.500
but

0:02:14.920,0:02:16.720
Because he had no history

0:02:16.720,0:02:18.460
He was able to

0:02:18.460,0:02:25.589
[write] his own. He was able to write what he believed and and what he wanted to say [to] people

0:02:26.320,0:02:31.739
And I think when we’re dealing with a narcissist when we’re dealing with abuse when we’re dealing with

0:02:33.760,0:02:39.420
Painful situations in our life we so often get caught in the story

0:02:41.920,0:02:48.300
we get so sick of listening to it get so sick of telling it because its victim speak and

0:02:49.390,0:02:55.169
after a while no one wants to hear it, and that’s discouraging all by itself to rate we

0:02:56.110,0:02:59.669
Just want to be acknowledged. We want someone to give us a cure

0:03:01.570,0:03:03.570
But here’s a cure

0:03:04.150,0:03:06.150
write the story

0:03:07.120,0:03:14.640
Stop telling yourself. The same stories and rewrite it take a crayon and write something else

0:03:15.970,0:03:19.169
What would you be if you had anything right now?

0:03:20.920,0:03:22.920
What’s your story?

0:03:23.650,0:03:26.880
Think about what you do to make yourself happy

0:03:31.730,0:03:36.189
When’s the last time that you did something that makes you happy I?

0:03:37.519,0:03:39.519
Didn’t realize that

0:03:40.370,0:03:46.390
When I got divorced that I stopped doing everything that I love to do

0:03:47.599,0:03:53.709
Because I was a victim. I was somebody that had had things happen to her and I

0:03:54.530,0:03:59.139
Stopped making dinners. I stopped having dinner parise. I love to cook. I love to entertain

0:03:59.810,0:04:01.810
and I just stopped I

0:04:03.439,0:04:08.019
Stopped being a photographer. I used to take pictures all the time

0:04:08.930,0:04:10.930
I’ve had many of my pictures published

0:04:11.870,0:04:17.440
But I stopped I stopped the interests it became a very hard work holic

0:04:18.109,0:04:22.179
Because [I] was in the survival mode I worked till one in the morning

0:04:23.120,0:04:25.120
five days a week and

0:04:25.639,0:04:32.439
Every single weekend, I still had fun. I still did things I still taught classes. I still went to things with my friends

0:04:33.050,0:04:36.430
But I stop doing what made me happy

0:04:37.099,0:04:40.839
And I think that’s key for us is to

0:04:41.479,0:04:43.479
understand and write it down

0:04:44.419,0:04:47.889
Makes you happy. What do you like to do? Do you like to hike?

0:04:49.280,0:04:51.309
Get out there and clear your head and hike

0:04:52.880,0:04:56.109
Like to ride your bike just do it

0:04:57.409,0:05:01.449
We so often forget what we want and our passions are

0:05:02.539,0:05:06.249
because we get roped into this story the story of

0:05:08.090,0:05:10.959
Betrayal Anger and hurt and

0:05:12.550,0:05:20.189
The Victim speak right, I’m not saying that we aren’t victims. I’m telling you [to] tell yourself a different story

0:05:21.100,0:05:26.309
Because we have the grounds I wish I had a prop of a crater on to show you right now

0:05:26.310,0:05:30.000
I should bother that gosh. I could had a V-8 um

0:05:31.870,0:05:33.870
but we have the power and

0:05:34.720,0:05:39.089
Just like that amazing poet today. Who had no story no

0:05:39.940,0:05:44.700
Genealogy tree and his grandmother just said be a velociraptor

0:05:45.580,0:05:49.859
Be your favorite ice cream the amount him be whatever you want to be

0:05:50.530,0:05:52.530
You write the story?

0:05:53.350,0:05:58.140
What has happened yesterday is the past we cannot do anything about that?

0:05:59.920,0:06:01.920
but in this moment

0:06:02.260,0:06:08.909
just like in that moment when I sat there that Tedxtalks surrounded by Fear I

0:06:10.180,0:06:13.739
Told myself. I’m okay. I’m okay right now

0:06:15.700,0:06:23.159
Why sit here and worry about it? Why not just be in the moment and enjoy a magical day

0:06:25.940,0:06:27.940
you

 

Listen to my podcasts anytime by subscribing with your favorite provider!

playerfm

Print Friendly, PDF & Email