When going through a divorce with a narcissist they will pull every trick. Share your story of a trick they pulled on you. If we can give someone else a little advanced warning then we are giving back.
Transcription:
Hi there, this is Tracy today we’re going to add another one to my… divorcing a narcissist story and series today we are gonna talk about the tricks and the lies that a narcissist will pull on you and what to expect as they throw this stuff at you. Whatever conduct, they are doing to you, expect excuses, they’re gonna have parental fitness allegations. And if you’re catching this video before the ugly starts and maybe you’re just planning your escape this is a good piece of information.
Go get a portable recorder or use your phone. Most phones can have an app that can record things, every time you see them, that recorder on, if they call you record their conversations, have it in your pocketbook have it in your pocket on your desk so that when they call you, you can go ahead and record the conversation. The reason that they’re gonna do this, is you wanna do this, they’re gonna beat you, but I want you to turn it around.
I want you to bake them if you’ve got kids and you think you’re gonna die for these kids then I want you to ask and… and record them, ask them What kind of a mother you were.
This is before it gets ugly alright, once it’s ugly, it’s tuoba. But ask them, you know, do they want the kids… what is their plan for carrying for them? You know, kids are in “Schall and maybe… and again, I’m going husband or wife. It could be either way, but if either of the spouses is a stay-at-home person, they can care for the children. If you’re both working, then you’ve got a 50-50 chance of losing your children. So the more that you can record them saying good things about you, the more this can be used to get them when they decide to use the children against you, they are going to use your children as ponds without question. It’s part of the game. You want them to say that you’re a good parent, you want them to say… and this will be used in the court, and when they’re ripping you apart and telling the lawyer and lies about you, you can submit these tapes to the judge and they will hear exactly what they said that you are a good parent, and that you know you’ve always done a good job. They’ll probably say that stuff to your face and turn around and go to the judge and tell them that you’re an alcoholic, and that you’re a drug addict and everything else.
We gonna pull every legal crap on you so expect it. This may help you fight less and win more, and frankly save money. I live in Colorado, where it’s apparently in the law that only one person has to know your recording. And this is a 100 percent and Mescalero. So check your state and ask your TA or as a cop, on this note, dark can easily record you and they bake you and they’re gonna push you on the phone, in person, in text and email and everything will be used against you, so do not give them ammunition to fight you with your own words. The X recorded a conversation with me and then edited the tape. It would have cost me thousands of dollars to prove that it was added.
I did have it edited and I didn’t have it edited. Had it analyzed by someone that was not admissible to the court, and then I found all of the cuts all of the brakes and the police and the judge, and nobody would listen to me unless I paid another two, 000 for a court-approved audio forensic person.
How even knew that existed? Apparently, they do. So be careful because any communication… keep it brief, keep it to the point. And just to be clear, the axle were not even married, but he was pulling child alienation on her in Epic proportion his shells were filled with books on child alienation, which if I was like ridiculous for his son, see this but that’s crazy and that selfish and that’s what he did. Expect them to use your kids as upon. I really don’t wanna pay any alimony they don’t wanna pay support, they don’t want a child support because in there in twisted minds, they’ve already paid enough for this game, they’re doing, they want more pie, they want more money and they’re gonna stop at nothing. And that’s going to include running you, it’s going to be hearing you in a way that you’ve never even imagined that they could spare you, they’re gonna use them as ponds and they’re going to threaten to take them away from you even if they don’t want them.
Okay, that’s important if you have to have that recorded, that I can’t really take care of them, you know, I work all this time or I travel whatever they’re gonna say. If you can get them to see that then you won’t fight as hard because then you’ve got evidence to show the judge, because they’re gonna flip it around and they’re gonna lie about you, so expect the worst and prepare yourself.
Another thing they’re gonna do is they’re gonna try to control you. This is their last chance to stick it to you. And they already know what works. I say Get some help from a therapist to make yourself stronger so that they can’t control you and that you are strong or not. We expect to walk on egg shells because everything, this is a water and everything that you do is going to be used against you. I mean, it’s like Matlock or whatever that show was that they said that it’s gonna be used against you in a court of law. Seriously, I’m not full in narcissists play for the wind. And when they’re done, the fact that you were in a relationship for 200 years, it needs nothing so be careful expect repercussions for being honest, do not be nice. I was honest and I did everything the judge asked me to.
My three to X did not even produce his financial records and he was ordered to bring them in, and in the end he got away with it to contempt of courts and and he brought in maybe 30 pages remember I had 5000 pages his own financial records were submitted like that were crazy. He actually put down in his monthly expenses first folly was living at mommy and daddy’s house, but you know he was putting down and he had like a 5000 mortgage at, and then he said that he needed an allowance of 300 a month in magazines. They’re going to exaggerate they’re going to make it that they need more, and they might even possibly records… something that my first husband did was, he was on commission and he sold furniture and what he did during our divorce, period was he stopped selling. At least in his name, he would have his friends put their name on it, collect the commission, and then in the end, his salary was down to nothing.
So well, I can’t pay her support because luck I don’t, I didn’t make anything. I’m so distraught over this divorce that I can’t even sell furniture, that’s what they’re gonna dangle.
Sex with. 30 under a magazines. He quit his job so that he didn’t have to be “dentary support, and when it came to him telling the judge that he couldn’t even afford to slayers.
I did something, it wasn’t like I thought of it beforehand, but is anyone ever gone to DSW? Like, if you shop there and you accrue a certain amount in a month, they send you a coupon in the mail, so it’s like 00 dollars off, so you spend 100.
I’m getting every two days, 50 counts.
I’ve never even seen a 50 on. How do you do that? I don’t wanna understand I’m getting a 50 luncheon a 10l or 20r I got like five pairs of my shoes with these free Cubans, but every single week, I’m giving these coupons, seriously. He actually used Rojo DS card, and they were sending me the coupons to cause miles away. So when you’re spending hours of dollars, they’re coming to me. So what I did was I locked into our DSW account at first I changed the email to mind and then the password, so I was basically locking him out, so he couldn’t go in, he couldn’t do anything. I mean, I could certainly have not used the car that would have been brilliant, but no, I was able to print copies of his receipts for that particular month, where he bought over two hours and dollars in shoes.
Yeah, seriously could work.
Support or to pay for his more age but he was mine, to thousand lenses. They show the actual picture and the size. And he was so surprised when I… you know, submitted this as he was now countering not wanting to pay me that he turned around and said that they were shoes for my son and I just showed him you know, show them that that’s not his size and, umm, you know, it’s just if we’re able to show the judge, she’s spending habits, um, and then he was actually ordered to find support now, he was in contempt again and eventually it caught up to him at being honest because I totally forgot that and I get side-track. Sorry, when I saw that he was not honest and there was nothing I can do that perjury.
All my papers proved that I was honest about the numbers. Every expense. Your “narcisse is gonna use policy against you with life. That is what they do it… we already know that’s like one of the red flags, they lie, so expect them to the even more and they have no repercussions for these lies. Because I was honest and they could lie and there was nothing I could do about it. I just spent more money to fight his lies, so peace Mark think out of the box, that little trip with the Ds or me and I would have known it in a million years in two thousand miles away. And yet, I’m getting that low-code in the MOU. So, think out of the box, think smart do what you can.
The next say, you’re gonna wanna do is expect to be blank.
You’re a bad mother you’re a bad father, you’re a drunk, you’re a drug addict, you’re a lesbian, you’re a… or you might be put on anti-depressants or anti-anxiety that’s part of this plan. If your doctor says you need it take because you’re gonna be all over the place, and if you have kids to… to watch out for, then you need to be there for them. And when you take antidepressants or MTA Xie Ty they’re gonna call you on it. Expect to be used of cheating.
Really.
I have news for you. hold up a mirror dirt bag. In most states it’s a no-fault state, even though two excited. I had, the emails. It didn’t matter. Those accusations they don’t matter in court expect gross exaggerations and false allegations they might even get the law enforcement involved. I’ve heard many people now, both men and women that had the police called on them, and think about this, there’s no better proof to say that you’re crazy to them having to call the police on you, and now you’ve got two balls it, you’ve got the divorce may be custody, and now you’ve got something to do with the police, this man or this woman that you set next to will resort to anything to bear it. So don’t be the reasonable one, ask for everything if you’re the reasonable one, if you care. That’s what we do, we’re co-dependence. There’s some reason why they’ve been using us all this time. If you have a reasonable one and you just say No, I don’t want that, I don’t want that. You take that if you’re a reasonable… they are gonna get… if you start here at half way, you’re gonna get this if you start at the top, you might end up half-way to ask for everything, and if you’re the reasonable on this makes us nice, it makes us kind and you probably believe, that this person will never hurt you. I’m, I’m really sorry to say it’s a really good chance. If these in areas where she summarises that they will fight you, they will fight you, and they will aim to hurt you.
Another thing to remember is to strike first whenever possible, make sure you talk to your lawyer about this if you can beat them to the punch you’ll have a much better chance of catching them off guard. Good luck and expect the worst.