After you discover that your beloved is a narcissist you must go grey rock. Grey rock is a term for no contact. You need to protect yourself because narcissist are very dangerous especially after they find out you know the truth. They will stop at nothing to hurt, smear, ruin your life. Go no contact to protect yourself and here is why….
WEBSITE – resources for victims – https://narcissistabusesupport.com
Transcription:
I hear this is Tracy today I’m gonna talk about going grey.
Rock. I never really heard this expression before I started doing my narcissist research and learning and understanding of Marais abuse. So, going great means that you act like a rock. This is not a rock, but it doesn’t do anything, it doesn’t answer it, doesn’t see it doesn’t want us to be exposed to this person anymore. Going graben, any contact, no contact, no contact, no contact that I say that seriously. You want to cut yourself off from this person, for every reason for your own protection. You have to remember that they have been in control all along they have controlled everything about your relationship and everything about your life, and that’s why it sucks right now. That is why because we allowed that to happen, we gave them control we let them be there at their beck and call their win their schedule, they have more control over our lives and we do and here’s our chance, this is it, this is your chance to get back.
Yes, get back by going away. And the reason we see this is because when you reach it out when you go for them, you have to think about what were your goals? If you reach out to them, you send them a text, what do you think they’re gonna say what things do you think they’re going to do or are they going to be sad? Is it going to make you happy, if you see that they are sad to… are you… is it gonna make you happy, if they apologize? Maybe that’s what you’re looking for. Just get them to apologize just get them to feel something because you’re hurting so much inside.
We have to remember, nurses have no ability… a compassion, empathy, they don’t care, they don’t care about you, they didn’t care when you were with them, so they’re not going to care. Now your pain is your pain and you are in control of taking that back by going gray rock and trying to push them out of your head. It’s a control thing that we have the control to. We have the keys to that car to say. I don’t want to think about them anymore.
I don’t care what they’re doing.
They’ll wish them. Well, just when it comes over you and it will come over, you think about what you think the outcome would be… you’ve got a couple of choices here.
They can ignore your attempts how’s it gonna make you feel? It’s not gonna feel good it’s going to feel shitty, and then you’re just gonna be one more layer as you sit here and wait for them to respond. They’ve got you, again, the control is they haven’t answered you and they’ve got you again. So that’s the first thing that.
What happened. The other thing would be that they actually do attach to, they do connect, they do respond back to a text or a call, or an email or something on social, but then they’re going to probably be little you, they’re gonna think, Oh poor you, you’re sad. Guess what, they’re not, they won’t be they just won’t ever be. So the other and the worst-case scenario. And I want you to think about this in the value of yourself because so often you think of the narcissist is somebody that we remember the good part, that little tiny bit of hope, that we had around them. Maybe it was in the beginning and maybe it was for many, many years but that wasn’t real. That person isn’t real. And so if they decided to come back after you go and you reach out to them, then I would say that you are just gonna get hard again, they’re gonna come back because maybe they don’t have another nurse. This supply line up and it’s going to hurt you again. There’s so many ways you can get hurt by reconnecting this person so I’m asking you to take control to take control of your heart when it says… and we look at Facebook, this means Gray rock on everything.
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