Right now, we’re gonna talk about the early warning signs of potential abuse.

These are signs that I think they should look for. I’m going to give you a little brief description after each one too much too soon. Adi in the nares world that is called love bombing. And it means that they’re pushing for instant close, like they may want you to move in right away, they may want your key they may wanna see you every day during the week that’s moving too fast. It’s not giving you a chance to digest it, it’s not giving you a chance to understand it, and it may feel like they’re sweeping off our feet because that’s what they want it to feel like. But you have to understand your boundaries, and if they don’t respect your boundaries, if they don’t like you, saying You know, “I think I’m gonna stay home tonight, if they don’t like that. That’s flag right there.

Room.

Note, not so good. Okay, infusion, this is sound. So, simple confusion. They changed their guidelines, they change the expectations. So if everything is going and you’re a path of seeing them three, four times a week and then it’s gone. Maybe it’s twice maybe it’s once no explanation, it’s sort of like well, you kinda got used to this, maybe it’s been a while, maybe they’ve got a key to your house or something and then they change it without discussing it without saying that he didn’t have time or whatever. These are signs if he’s intrusive and controlling. This is a big one. They generally wanna control you, they wanna know where you are, so they’re very interested, and that is kind of showing that they care so much and they just wanna know who you are, but in reality it’s controlling, they wanna know where you are and they want to make sure, that there’s no one there that they could be jealous of possessive of they tend to get very jealous of people and accuse you alerting or even having relations with somebody else. And the reason they do that is because they are and they’re just projecting.

Isolation is another one. When they insist on spending time with you instead of you and friends because a normal relationship would evolve after the initial dating, love stuff into something that you bring your friends in your friends start to check them out before you get to lock stage, you’re vetting them and your friends are trying to see if they like him too. So, insulation if he just doesn’t wanna go out if he wants to keep you home and watch TV ’cause it’s so romantic and all, but in actuality, it’s a game, and he’s trying to kind of isolate you so that when he starts to abuse you, you’ve got a whole lot less community that can help you if they’re prone to anger, anger is a big thing that they can get out of proportion quickly. So if you see little drops of the mask where they get anger at the valet parker or they get angry at the water, if you’re starting to see that that does means he’s capable of doing it to you, as well.

Unknown past and respect for individuals, if they have not treated their previous partner well and this is a hard part, if they talk badly about them if they “diorite them in any way. This is our help do that to you too. When he’s done, that’s a game. That they do now. It’s hard to judge that because I am divorced and I know what my ex-husband told people about me, but I also know that he was crazy and I told it about him. So how do you… it’s a really hard thing, but if you can find out what their respect for other people is I think that you will be in a much better place. Their self-centered, always wanna do what they wanna do and maybe you suggest something else, and they just don’t wanna go, they’re ignoring your wishes, and that is actually abuse. I mean, it just sounds like they’re rude or maybe they’re just not that nice. That’s abuse, umm, double standards. They expect things for you to live up to, but they don’t live up to them themselves. They are just lists even here yet. We didn’t get to lighters. A clean drug uses on the list. Because they don’t necessarily cause a person to be abusive we have to understand that it can certainly make things worse. They could lose their judgment, they could get more anger if they’re drinking or doing drugs. So that kind of behavior is something you need to watch for if you are watching them during their alcohol use, and you maybe think it’s just a little bit too much, then keep that and just put a check next to it and wonder if they blame others partners and they never accept responsibility for their actions. This is a classic narcissist thing. This is something that we have to watch out for. Because if they are blaming others they’re gonna blame you. So be careful with that. They have to take responsibility at some point, and not accepting what part they had in anything.

It back inappropriate sexual behavior or demands course have their own way of making it all seem so wonderful, but if they’re making you do something you don’t wanna do, that is also abuse.

The most important thing is to trust your gut and your intuition if you feel uncomfortable, be really careful. Take down a list, make yourself a journal somewhere, somewhere safe that you can just say No, this didn’t feel right. So that if it happens again, you can go back and look at that. I think documenting it for yourself is really helpful, because it makes you not think your crazy later on if you find yourself making excuses for your partner with your friends. Well, he’s this or… Oh, well, you went through a vent for… so that’s why he’s this way. Or if you feel that you have to make excuses for him in any way and men or women say, then that’s not a good sign you should never have to make excuses for somebody because that’s not how a real relationship works. They abuse you manipulate intimidate you to gain power and that is their game. So these are just some of the things that I’ve just learned and I hope that it’s helped. Obviously, I’m reading it, but I, I’m so passionate about understanding my life that I’m hoping that reading this will help your.

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