Red flag of a narcissist. Narcissists can be very charming and people generally like them. This creates a false persona that the victim of Narcissist abuse gets hooked by. We want our friends, or girlfriends or boyfriends to be charming and there is nothing wrong with someone being charming. But a narcissist is only pretending to be charming, this is an ACT!
What you have to be alerted to is an inconsistent behavior that really isn’t charming.
Is your narcissist charming in public, maybe they are fake charming, maybe they leave the party and act differently at home. These are the flags to look for “if the person is different after they are alone with you”.Red flag of a narcissist.
All statements made in this video are expressions of the opinion of the speaker, and should be regarded as such. The video is made to serve a therapeutic purpose for the speaker or speakers and to assist others in recognizing and dealing with matters in their own lives which they believe may be similar.
I’m a survivor of Narcissistic abuse and my goal with this channel is to educate other “victims” as they transition to becoming a “survivor”. I believe that education is our best way to heal, and the best way to not become a victim or supply to another narcissist. These videos are a healing part of my personal journey and while no animals were hurt in the making of these videos these are representations of the two relationships I have had and discovering after 55 years that my mother was a narcissist.
Transcription:
Hi, this is Tracy I’m going to talk about my red flag of a narcissist. Number three, I know that there are many people out there that are talking about this, and many people that have had experiences and I am learning so much for them from them. I’d like to make a call out to the people who have literally changed my perspective on life in the last 30 days, Dana from the narcissist support Richard, from the Spartan life, coach and sound back me who I leave a psychiatrist, that’s wrote books on narcissism. Look that up. If you are wondering, anything about Narcissus behavior and co-dependency. All of them are so talented and in their experiences, it is giving me hope that I am not alone that I have been tricked and that I am a victim of my life and not knowing things. Does that make sense? So they were going about narcissist ratifying number three and I am calling at terming. terming happens at the beginning.
Certainly, I don’t think it necessarily ends until the discard state. So that’s when they decide they’ve got more used to suck on you like a vampire. So in the beginning, and maybe all the way through Narcissists are incredibly terming. Everyone that reach them thinks that they are just the best. Everybody that you know I just think, Oh, he is Prince Charming. And I’ve had two narcissist relationships, one after another, and I’m just finishing with the toxic really impact of the second one right now. So I’m learning, I am not an expert, I am not a doctor, I am someone who is a victim of narcissist abuse, I am learning a lot about myself and what made me a target. And I’d like to encourage you to open that door, take off that layer as they say, in the sake world to really understand yourself and understand why you’re a victim. Or how do the same things keep happening to you when other people seemingly just have normal relationships? My ex-husband, that we are calling two X in this series.
First terming goes. People thought that he was Prince terming and I did too, I was so enamored with him, his charm, his manners, His grace is elegance, his presence was just like this charming thing. Now, I would not say he was good looking, I just found this charm about him this emitting that was certainly, you know, a factor in me turning towards him. Uh, number three that were going him. I can, I thought he was beautiful, but when I first met him, like the first he comes, I didn’t think he was handsome, I wouldn’t go. Oh, that’s predation. Not say This person is a good looking but to me because of their charm, they worked their way into my heart and they, it didn’t matter to me that they weren’t Prince Charming looking right, the husband actually how to Castle a castle with no one to parrots on it all rooms armories. We were actually married in front of the fireplace in the armory, by a judge who said my name wrong which was early weird, but anyway, so the tar just comes on and they take this and they play off of what you’re looking for, they play this charm to when you, if you aren’t buying their story if you aren’t born buying their charm, then they can’t manipulate you so they will try as hard as they can to sit there and show you that they are the best, they are the most thoughtful they are, carrying and sweet and witty.
Oh yes, it and giving… and so, giving my ex-husband when I met him, he was an employee at the same company that I was at, and it was odd that I had candy Elon, my desk and fed half of it, and he had a snack bar in his office. So we kind of had that similarity but that was his giving part. You know, you would spend hundreds of dollars a week, on snacks and go to Costco and supply everyone. Because he was such a good guy. Oh, I knew I was giving candy ’cause I was a good girl, so it kinda made sense. That carries very generous. And if we ever went out with people, he would never let anyone pay he would sneak off he would take that check every single time and a lot of people used him for that. He was wealthy, obviously, and he used that as part of his charm. I wouldn’t even take anything from him for like a year and a half, even though we were married. I didn’t want anything because I didn’t want to be construed that I was taking him for his money. That was their manipulation, they knew I wasn’t gonna take it. So let… to offer her more. Let’s just do it, let’s show her. And eventually my resistance became none and I did take the term pining. I talk what they gave me, umm, the rectum his term was intelligence, he would pretend he was so smart and yet at his actions, both of them, both of their actions were dumb, they would actually be inept and they wouldn’t be able to handle things like their taxes or anything about their life that was of normal cleaning off the counter of food remembering its garbage state.
I don’t think either one of them are intelligent enough to do the normal, day-to-day things. And that confused me because here they were with both these big jobs and they thought, “Oh they’re so smart and they’re so special. And the reality was neither one of them were and I was totally fool because of this charm this charm that just emanated from them and captivated me.
And they gave me everything that I was looking for that’s mirroring and we’ll talk about that another day but I really wanted to cover this fact that they are very charming and although we want terming in our life, I think it’s a combination. We just have to watch for the other signs and watch for the other side. If there is terming all the time, then terming it. If charming is terming when you want something.
And then not terming when he decides not to right, that’s the key that is the secret is it’s give and take and it’s for them take, take, take. So the more they could prove to you that they are this upstanding, wonderful charming, intelligent attractive witty smart charming. I can even say to me five times but the more they say it to you, the more you believe it, and I know that I won’t be a victim again and I encourage you to look at their actions. This is gonna be my mantra, because now that I’m figuring things out, I’m seeing the difference between their actions and what they really did and how they came their way out of the bad behavior. Every single time they would do something that wasn’t in character, and I would be like, intelligently thinking This isn’t normal, this isn’t right. I might even call them on it, and they would care, the rabbit, they would call me and manipulate me into thinking I was over-reacting that they weren’t really being assholes. But you know, what actions do speak louder than words. So, I encourage you, please watch for this red flag for me by a narcissist is really not fair..