The last thirty days I have learned more about myself then I have learned in 55 years. I have learned new terms, a new language and YouTube has been here to teach me. I feel like I have gotten a lifetime of knowledge by watching and listening to real people’s stories. I learned what a narcissist is, what a sociopath is, what a codependent is and what it means to be a victim. I would never have said the word victim about myself but the more I learn the clearer it becomes. I have heard that it’s not my fault, as a child in a very disfunctional house I learned to cope in a few ways. First by hiding my head in the sand, most people say this is the only reason I did survive when the rest of my family fell. If I went along thinking that life was fine… If I loved men as much as I could surely they would live me back.
My friends who have loved me for all my life, know I would do anything for them. Know my heart is true and loyal. I am successful in my self taught career, I have an amazing child about to graduate college and my life seems to be filled with drama.
My mantra for years has been not my monkeys, not my circus. Yet the drama followed me, I would say- I know CRAZY! And trust me I knew it so well I was sucked up in it and kept lowering my bar, lower and lower because I became afraid to love. So less was ok, this way I wouldn’t get hurt. Save my heart by keeping it locked with a key. Still enjoying my friends and my life I have made for myself.
I was a target for two narcissist men and I never knew it. I fell for every trick in the book.
This is my first video on the red flags of a narcissist – love bombing. These are real examples of how I was fooled by a narcissist. I hope that if one person is able to find something that turns a light on for them that this coming out is worth it.
Trust me as a business owner I fear this exposure this deep part of me I have hidden so long. Join me on this journey as I learn and teach all that I learned.
I’m a survivor of Narcissistic abuse and my goal with this channel is to educate other “victims” as they transition to becoming a “survivor”. I believe that education is our best way to heal, and the best way to not become a victim or supply to another narcissist. These videos are a healing part of my personal journey and while no animals were hurt in the making of these videos these are representations of the two relationships I have had and discovering after 55 years that my mother was a narcissist.
Please note: I am not a therapist, psychologist, psychiatrist or coach so use this information as my own personal journey of healing and the information that has been shared with me by friends, other YouTubers, groups and community. This video is not intended to treat or diagnose any condition, if you believe you or a loved one is suffering from narcissistic abuse please use seek any help from your community. Check out narcissistabusesupport.com for some resources available to you.