Narcissists are never wrong. They never are accountable, and they never apologize. In their minds, you have done everything, not them. Why would they ever apologize? This red flag is often seen early in the relationship and continues until the day you go to no contact.

Why did we not notice this?

Simple, you probably did notice it, but it became a joke. They sometimes make light of the thing they should be apologizing for. If you are lucky they turn it around and word salad you into feeling guilty. Or, they gaslight you into saying you did whatever they should be apologizing for.

If they cannot and will not take accountability for anything because it is always someone else’s fault, then they just don’t need to apologize.

Common courtesy overlooked first

Respecting time – If someone is late to an event or even coming home, that person apologizes. However, even though it is disrespectful, when a narcissist is late, they tell you this is just who they are. They say that you need to put much less pressure on them. They make you out to be the bad guy/girl.

Cheating – They cheat and somehow it becomes your fault. You didn’t show them enough passion, or, you drove them into the arms of someone else.

Taking your money and assets – Normal people, would feel guilty about doing the types of things a narcissist does, but they never take responsibility or apologize. Remember the “no empathy” part? They don’t care if they financially ruin you. What’s theirs is theirs and what yours is theirs too.

Parents that hurt – When you grow up with a parent who is a narcissist you become accustomed to never hearing apologies. Then, when you get hooked again and marry one, that person never apologizes either. You are used to it and have a very low bar for demanding an apology. Parents that abuse, not only avoid apologies, they make the child feel like they have no right to ask for one. Children become tragically silenced.