How To Spot Someone Playing Victim

Not all victims are manipulative. Feeling like a victim has taken on negative connotations, but there are people who “play the victim” in order to manipulate you. This is a favorite defense of narcissists and other personality-disordered people. In some other instances, this behavior is learned as a child because as a way to get needs […]

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I Love Pissing You Off, Because Then I Know You Still Love Me

The Insidious Nature of Narcissistic Abuse and How To Stop Being Their Supply Have you ever noticed that your partner is really only happy when you’re sad, and then when you’re happy, they’re mad? Toxic people love when you are miserable, especially if they’ve made it so. They feed on your attention, even when it’s […]

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The Pain and Danger of Emotional Abuse

Some don’t know that emotional abuse is as damaging as physical abuse. It is an unseen assault on one’s soul. One can experience emotional abuse in a family with a parent, in the workplace with an associate, or in a relationship. Narcissistic abuse is becoming more prevalent in our society, or at least we’re hearing […]

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6 Tips For A Great Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day creates lots of expectations that are often unrealized. It’s fraught with landmines, whether you’re in or out of a relationship. But the grass isn’t always greener. Is your situation described here? Read six tips for having a great holiday. You’re Alone I can recall Valentine’s Days when I wished I were in love […]

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The 4 Truths About Narcissists You Need To Know

Especially if you’re trying to heal after a relationship with one Everyone makes mistakes. All people are inherently good. He/she didn’t mean to hurt me. He/she didn’t know what they were doing. In an ideal world, all of the above would be true. In an ideal world, every single human would be good at their […]

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You’re Not Imagining It. Narcissistic Abuse Can Make You Sick.

You’ve been in survival mode for the longest time. Not really living. Not thriving. Just existing as if in a vacuum. Nothing they do or say surprises you anymore – if anything, it just propels you further into numbness. You know when you react, they will loop you into an endless cycle of conflict and […]

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The Holiday Hoover

An opportune time to troll for supply. Holiday expectations can be challenging. Living up to the idyllic narrative of collective bonding and celebrations in which people everywhere are supposedly experiencing holiday rituals and get-togethers that foster well-being and intimacy can be anxiety-producing. For many folks, the seasonal lure of promised pleasure, coupled with the glitz […]

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9 Tips for Coping with Holiday Depression and Stress

The stress of the holidays triggers sadness and depression for many people. This time of year is especially difficult because there’s an expectation of feeling merry and generous. People compare their emotions to what they assume others are experiencing or what they’re supposed to feel and then think that they alone fall short. They judge themselves and […]

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Complex Grief and Trauma In Toxic Relationships

We can’t talk about narcissistic emotional abuse without talking about grief and trauma. Both of these will come up in your recovery. Each individual has their own unique losses to assess and to grieve if it becomes necessary to leave the relationship. Some of these may include: loss of a dream loss of an intact […]

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Can A Narcissist Change? You Betcha — Just Not In The Way You Think

…And definitely not in the way you hope! change changed/changes/changing verb: to make (someone or something) different; alter or modify noun: the act or instance of making or becoming different tactic: what a narcissist does to keep their victim in a state of confusion and dependency Okay, maybe that last one isn’t exactly in the dictionary. […]

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