Getting unstuck from an insidious cycle of penance and self-punishment “Do not look for healing at the feet of those who broke you” ~ Rupi Kaur (Milk and Honey) Many of the folks I see for complex trauma therapy are immersed in the arduous process of dismantling their bondage to a malignant narcissist (NPD). Although the […]Read More
IS IT LOVE OR OBLIGATION?
Although it is hard to make an exact definition of love, describing love by how it feels makes an understanding of love more accessible. I’m talking about deep, long-term love that is shared equally by both partners. The word love is often used to describe romance, attraction, and sexual energy — all of which […]Read More
Lessons Learned From The Narcissist
If you have been in a relationship with someone with a narcissistic personality disorder or even one who has some traits of narcissism, no doubt you have been hurt deeply. Having a family member, parent, or sibling with narcissism can cause great harm. Emotional abuse is just as damaging as physical abuse – this type […]Read More
Why Can’t You Just Get Over It?
I’m guessing that there is not one person reading this who can say they have never had their heart broken. Even if it was just that childhood crush, we’ve all been there before, and some of us more than others. Heartbreak can take a toll on our mental, emotional, and even physical health, depending on […]Read More
When a Social Justice Warrior is a Communal Narcissist
Identifying when malevolence is cloaked in philanthropy When I was a kid, I was enamored with topical folk songwriter and political activist Phil Ochs. The abysmal circumstances I was born into were assuaged by his activism, brilliant lyricism, and melodic voice. He inspired me and gave me hope. Ochs was emblematic of what the ideology […]Read More
Is It Love or Love Bombing?
Human beings have an innate desire for love and belonging. We want to know that someone else thinks the world of us and would love to spend their time and life with us. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with that as it’s how we are made. However, that NEED for love can be used as a […]Read More
I Love Pissing You Off, Because Then I Know You Still Love Me
The Insidious Nature of Narcissistic Abuse and How To Stop Being Their Supply Have you ever noticed that your partner is really only happy when you’re sad, and then when you’re happy, they’re mad? Toxic people love when you are miserable, especially if they’ve made it so. They feed on your attention, even when it’s […]Read More
Anatomy of Abuse: How Predators Snare Their Prey
Episodic ruptures were peppered throughout their tumultuous relationship, but when seemingly benign texting commenced during the pandemic, Megan began to question if she was correct in concluding that her ex was a full-blown malignant narcissist. In fact, their friendly exchanges caused her to ruminate over how the early stages of their courtship were not defined by […]Read More
The Pain and Danger of Emotional Abuse
Some don’t know that emotional abuse is as damaging as physical abuse. It is an unseen assault on one’s soul. One can experience emotional abuse in a family with a parent, in the workplace with an associate, or in a relationship. Narcissistic abuse is becoming more prevalent in our society, or at least we’re hearing […]Read More
Manipulative Tactics That Make You Stay
As humans, we want to believe what others say, especially those we love. It is hard to fathom that someone we care for would not be honest with us. Unfortunately, being in a relationship with a narcissist or abusive personality will often condition us to believe whatever the person says, without question. Why be suspicious […]Read More