Episodic ruptures were peppered throughout their tumultuous relationship, but when seemingly benign texting commenced during the pandemic, Megan began to question if she was correct in concluding that her ex was a full-blown malignant narcissist. In fact, their friendly exchanges caused her to ruminate over how the early stages of their courtship were not defined by […]
Read MoreThe Holiday Hoover
An opportune time to troll for supply. Holiday expectations can be challenging. Living up to the idyllic narrative of collective bonding and celebrations in which people everywhere are supposedly experiencing holiday rituals and get-togethers that foster well-being and intimacy can be anxiety-producing. For many folks, the seasonal lure of promised pleasure, coupled with the glitz […]
Read MoreDehumanization: The Psychological and Sociological Practice of Destroying Others
On the heels of ending a long-term relationship with a malignant narcissist, Lauren vehemently and unceasingly blamed herself for ‘allowing’ him to sadistically debase her. Although she intellectually concurred with M. Scott Peck’s premise that genuine love is volitional, that true intimacy is contingent on honoring one another’s humanity and that another’s proclivity to abuse […]
Read MoreThe Narcissist’s Spouse: Understanding Primary Supply
As a complex trauma therapist who specializes in treating trauma incurred through narcissistic abuse, I encounter many spouses desperate to escape from the perfidious torment of marriage to a malignant narcissist. Similarly, I work with adult children of mothers and fathers who embody malignant narcissistic traits or fit the diagnostic criteria for NPD. Narcissistic Personality […]
Read MoreLove After Narcissistic Abuse: Sharing Real Intimacy After Being The Supply
My experience as a survivor and a therapist specializing in treating both complex trauma and narcissistic abuse syndrome has shown me that the violent personal assault inflicted by NPD abuse causes Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) in victims, irrespective of whether they present with a prior history of complex trauma. Accordingly, having somehow managed to keep oneself glued […]
Read MoreSons of Narcissistic Fathers: The Pain and Shame of Never Measuring Up
Even in this day and age of generational shifts in parenting and shared parental responsibilities, the father is still viewed by many as a collateral caregiver whose primary function is to mete out discipline and pay the bills. However, the father is so much more than just an authority figure and a material provider. In fact, the […]
Read MoreThe Subtle Abuser
Abominable, morally depraved abusers are easy to spot and always remembered. People such as Leona Helmsley (The Queen of Mean), Starlet Joan Crawford (Mommie Dearest), knighted BBC notable Jimmy Seville, brutal Haitian dictator ‘Papa Doc,’ sex offender and financier Jeffrey Epstein, and Tele-evangelist Jim Bakker, whose empire fell from Grace due to sex scandals, addiction, fraud and theft of ministry funds, are but […]
Read MoreCognitive Dissonance and Narcissistic Abuse
Cognitive Dissonance and Narcissistic Abuse: Breaking Through The Fog of Confusion by Rev. Sheri Heller When American social psychologist Leon Festinger (1956) read about a cult’s fixation with the end of the world due to an apocalyptic flood predicted by extraterrestrials, he embarked on an empirical study to explore the believers’ reactions to the inevitability of having […]
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The Narcissistically Disordered Family
The Narcissistically Disordered Family A Glimpse At The Grooming And Abusing That Occurs Within The Home by Rev. Sheri Heller, LCSW In a memoir piece I wrote about my disturbing relationship with my narcissistically disordered father I elaborated on how his neglect, sadistic mockery, objectification and abandonment nearly destroyed me. The proverbial silver lining of having […]
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