A narcissist cannot feel empathy – Unable to feel empathy for someone’s loss, pain or illness a narcissists reaction will not be in the realm of ‘understanding’. When faced with having to feel for another they will turn it around to get attention for themselves because they are being ignored.
Watch for: they cannot put themselves in anyone else’s shoes, even their own children. When they are sick watch for them to make the biggest deal out of their illness and often if they feel ignored they lash out and attack. If you or a friend loses someone watch the reaction, is it genuine or just another act. During your first fight or break up watch for them to be insensitive to your feelings.